77p egg Eggwife

77p egg: Eggwife is a deliberately janky first-person shooter inspired by Postal 2, Duke Nukem 3D, and Goat Simulator. You play 77p egg, a potty-mouthed stick figure briefly mourning the loss of its wife before a supermarket trip to find a replacement goes spectacularly off the rails. Sheffield (here "Sheffie") is the setting, and almost everything in it wants you dead.

Ten story levels in and under the city push you against gelatinous urine blobs, mechanised napalm-poo tanks, nail-laced tampon helicopters, and a milk-worshipping cult. The arsenal stays on theme: the long-range Applicator, the 7-Barrel Sh*tgun, the silicone-firing Crossbowner, the high-rate Stigmatic 77,000 nailgun, plus a fistful of equally unhinged sidearms. Pee on command, eat to refill your poop meter, double-jump, and strafe-run your way past anything that survives.

Six difficulty settings range from "flaccid" to "dysfunction," the last of which randomises geometry, weapons, and movement. Two endless arena levels, pacifist and pass-a-fist challenge runs, an original soundtrack by General Mumble and others, and a deliberate cliffhanger ending round out an experience that mostly knows exactly what it is.